I blog at Male Submission Art, host Kink On Tap, and support KinkForAll as much as I can, among more things.
Perhaps unsurprisingly, I'm censored in some places. Make of that what you will. Follow me on Twitter.
Posts tagged: trans
Ms. and Mr. Jones had to be Xtra careful. If they kept bouncing it up in the air and saying how strong and active it was, they’d be treating it more like a boy than an X. But if all they did was cuddle it and kiss it and tell it how sweet and dainty it was, they’d be treating it more like a girl than an X.
[…]
They bought a storybook about a brave princess who rescued a handsome prince from his tower, and another one about a sister and brother who grew up to be a baseball star and a ballet star and you had to guess which.
The head scientists of Project Baby X checked all their purchases and told them to keep up the good work. They also reminded the Joneses to see page 4629 of the Manual where it said, “Never make Baby X feel embarrassed or ashamed about what it wants to play with. And if X gets dirty climbing rocks, never say, “nice little Xes don’t get dirty climbing rocks”.
Likewise, it said, “if X falls down and cries, never say, “Brave little Xes don’t cry. Because, of course, nice little Xes do get dirty, and brave little Xes do cry. No matter how dirty X gets or how hard it cries, don’t worry. It’s all part of the Xperiment.
(Do yourself a favor and read this. It’s short. It’s also particularly interesting in light of the story of Storm.)
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“Hir” by Alysia Harris and Aysha El Shamayleh, on HBO’s Brave New Voices:
Melissa sits in the back of the classroom afraid to speak up,
She pulls akwardly at her extra loose khaki cargo pants,
She doesn’t want the boys to notice her.
James finds himself at the back of a classroom,
His baseball cap casts a shadow on his pimple stained forehead,
A wide shirt hangs from his broad shoulders,
But no one ever noticed him.
Melissa
The teacher asks,
And she says nothing because she is not here,
And Melissa has never been here,
Because Melissa is just some abstract jumble of syllables that doesn’t fit her position,
She is not what she seems,
She doesn’t want to have to explain to her mother for the 232nd time why she doesn’t want to wear a dress to prom,
Doesn’t paint her face it’s cause her whole body is painted on.
Melissa, Melissa
James doesn’t want to have to explain where he came from,
Cause with the exception of Melissa he has been deemed an abstract reality by everyone,
All he wishes for is to get to wear a tuxedo to prom.
And Melissa has been tucking in breasts that will be growing for three years now,
Been using duct tape to press them down and mould them more into pecs,
She just wishes that people would understand that at birth her genatils didn’t know which way to grow,
Mad at God who couldnt relay a message directly to her hormones that they should produce more testosterone,
The only person who understands her is James,
And they have been playmates since the age of four,
Around the time girls notice boys and boys notice girls,
See James’ family wanted daughters instead of sons,
And Melissa was always like that male beetle that everyone called a ladybug,
Melissa, Melissa where is she?
Sometimes she wishes she could rip the skin of her back,
Every moment of everyday feels trapped in the flesh of a stranger,
Melissa,
As she stands to her feet wanting to say
“I’m here, I’ve been here since I was born, so quit asking me if I’m a him or a her, Cause when you combine the two pronouns you get H.I.R,
Hir,
And God combined the two genders and put me in this body transgendered,
I’m here so quit talking about me like I’m not here.”
James falls back into Melissa’s skin,
And the two comfort each other in a syncapated heartbeats,
Waiting for the day when Melissa can finally scrub off this made up genetic make up,
When the teacher asks for James and he can say “I’m here.”
This blog is my job. If it moves you, please help me keep doing this Work by sharing some of your food, shelter, or money. Thank you!
I’ve always had a problem with the whole gender-role vs. D/s role vs. Top/bottom role vs. S/m role thing, in a number of different ways.
For one thing, as a transgendered woman, I’ve faced a disturbing amount of assumption about oppressive gender-role stereotypes. I’m seen as acting as an offensive caricature of femininity every time I enter into a relationship dynamic where I’m taking a submissive or passive role, reprimanding me for reinforcing those stereotypes conflating femininity and submissiveness. From the other side, during the transition process, when I was still under the watchful eye of the gatekeepers in the psych profession, any time I demonstrated dominant or assertive behaviour, I was accused of not really being female at all, since I was clearly displaying masculine traits. The fact that I actually have a multi-dimensional identity that fluctuates along multiple spectra, in ways that do not conform to the gender role stereotypes, seems never to enter the mind of the essentialists.
Further, when we go beyond the gender-role stereotypes, into the many different forms that interactions within ‘The Scene’ can take, both in terms of general relationship dynamics and scene play dynamics, I’ve seen disturbing amounts of conflation there. Generally speaking, I tend to find more enjoyment from bottoming - that is, having things done with (or to) my body, either in the form of bondage/restraint, or sensory play. However, in that context, I am most definitely not submissive: I do not obey orders, and I do not accept acts of ‘discipline’ inflicted upon me. The result of this has, with disturbing frequency, been interpreted that I’m a ‘brat’ submissive that needs to be ‘trained’ and/or ‘broken’, by those who can’t accept the concept of a bottom who is simply not submissive at all.
There are a disturbing number of groups and subcultures that conflate male=dominant=top=assertive and female=submissive=bottom=passive, both inside and outside of the BDSM communities.