I blog at Male Submission Art, host Kink On Tap, and support KinkForAll as much as I can, among more things.
Perhaps unsurprisingly, I'm censored in some places. Make of that what you will. Follow me on Twitter.
Posts tagged: sex
![Think your sex is so “alternative”? Not if you’re a skinny, white, cisgender, able-bodied, submissively-presenting object of a male gaze:
Public Internet: How you look to others.
FetLife: How you think you look.
Mainstream porn: How you think you don’t look.
Tumblr: How you wish you looked.
[Image: A side-by-side comparison of screenshots taken from sources for porn. Two are “mainstream” (a Google image search and typical thumbnail gallery post page), and two are “alternative” (FetLife’s Kinky & Popular feed and a typical porn-Tumblr archive page). A red equal sign is in the center.]
Please do note that this entry is tagged: “bullshit I’m tired of having to spend energy showing people is fucking obvious.”](http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m31vxdLluf1qzs83po1_1280.png)
Think your sex is so “alternative”? Not if you’re a skinny, white, cisgender, able-bodied, submissively-presenting object of a male gaze:
- Public Internet: How you look to others.
- FetLife: How you think you look.
- Mainstream porn: How you think you don’t look.
- Tumblr: How you wish you looked.
[Image: A side-by-side comparison of screenshots taken from sources for porn. Two are “mainstream” (a Google image search and typical thumbnail gallery post page), and two are “alternative” (FetLife’s Kinky & Popular feed and a typical porn-Tumblr archive page). A red equal sign is in the center.]
Please do note that this entry is tagged: “bullshit I’m tired of having to spend energy showing people is fucking obvious.”
This blog is my job. If it moves you, please help me keep doing this Work by sharing some of your food, shelter, or money. Thank you!
Japanese pornography is so dominant here [in China] and they really promote the image of young innocent submissive female, and they appear to be underage. I interviewed a lot of guys who say that, yes, this is my primary fantasy. I want to see this submissive girl. What does it mean? I think it means that it gives the guy the sense of empowerment. They can handle the submissive girl. So in this fantasy world, they can deal with this kind of girl, but it doesn’t mean that they have this girl in real life but the fact that they have to probably deal with the quite powerful women around them. In Japan there are studies explaining that this fantasy is a reversal, a sense of weakness and incompetence that Japanese male was like spoiled by mothers also. In China it’s a little bit similar.
[…]
I found a lot of Chinese men and Chinese women have different aspirations…so does it have anything to do with the fact that they create the fantasy of easy submissive girl. Maybe it’s related. It’s a kind of reversal, that they can dream about submissive girl, but in reality, those Chinese men are rejected so badly by Chinese women, for instance on dating sites. The Chinese women are very demanding, and they publicize their requirements. And the Chinese men feel quite bad in a way. So I can see that Hong Kong and China is patriarchic. And I know that in reality, in the workplace, and at home, men have a lot of power. But that’s also just one way of investigating the reality. There’s also other realities where women have a lot of power as well.
This blog is my job. If it moves you, please help me keep doing this Work by sharing some of your food, shelter, or money. Thank you!
Why can’t sex always be this honest, some guys get offended too easily.
yesssssss
WHY IS THIS NOT MY LIFE RIGHT NOW?!?!?!
“What are you trying to do, dig your way to China?”
THIS IS AMAZING.
“Yeah, you know it.”
My problem is I have trouble being able to speak during sex. :-/
WHERE IS THE CONDAM
^^all of the above
Why do I not know where this is from? Pretty PLEASE someone tell me where this is from? If you send me a direct link I will…well, in the spirit of the honesty being shown, I will probably squee with delight several seconds sooner as I will not need to do a Google search. :) Kthxbai.
UPDATE (several seconds after posting): Oh hey. Problem solved: Friends with Benefits, directed by Will Gluck (2011). Thanks, Internet!
This blog is my job. If it moves you, please help me keep doing this Work by sharing some of your food, shelter, or money. Thank you!
The surprisingly gay world of insect sex - Nonfiction - Salon.com
If insects can grok “no means no,” so can you. No more excuses: consent counts. End of story.
This blog is my job. If it moves you, please help me keep doing this Work by sharing some of your food, shelter, or money. Thank you!
All right, I’m going to go out on a limb and stir the pot (not to mention mixing my metaphors), because it’s a very gross pot:
[Dear Everyone In Fandom Under The Age Of 18,]
It’s not that I don’t think you should participate in fandom. I myself started at 15. But FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, do not advertise your age anywhere if you are writing/commenting on/or doing art for a story with an adult rating (in other words, PORN). Because that gets REALLY TRICKY for those of us who are adults and have to think about child pornography laws (a blanket term that ALSO includes rules about PROVIDING people under 18 with porn).
Thank you for your time,
J.
GOD, THIS.
No, fuck that shit.
If you’re under the age of 18 and you want to participate in discussions about real or imagined sex or sexuality of any kind, it’s true you’ve got to do it really carefully for everyone’s sake—yours and others’. On the other hand, that very fact shows just how ageist and puritanical our society is.
I am very glad to hear that people who are legally minors are making themselves and their interest in “adult” sexuality discussions known. I hope these discussions are self-affirming for all parties, and conducted in a way that respects everyone’s participation as well as their personal boundaries. But I am also glad that some of these conversations are clearly making the people with power—the adults—uncomfortable, because it forces them to acknowledge young people’s presence and, more importantly, the validity of their presence.
If you are an adult and you are bothered by having to think about child porn laws, then guess what, you are privileged. You are probably someone who should be on the front fucking lines of fighting against the incredibly harmful censorship and morality laws that are so commonly used to target you and young people under the disingenuous guise of being “for your own protection”!
Because, really, how dare any community encourage behaviors that make it necessary for an individual to lie to protect themselves? What right do you have to pressure someone into lying about their age anymore than you have to pressure them to lie about their sexual orientation or race or gender? And it’s not like this is news; women routinely use gender-neutral or even traditionally male-sounding names online because they are likely to be harassed otherwise. Since this is far less common in fandom, I’d like to think that fandom communities are filled with people who are damn well aware of the pain of feeling ostracized for something about yourself that you are powerless to change—like your gender or age.
Systemically silencing or discouraging youth from participating as empowered, fully self-actualized and self-expressed individuals in sexuality discussions is called sexual adultism and it’s a fucking detestably common behavior pattern I’d like to see ended.
So, wanna fix this problem faster? Stop telling young people to shut up or lie. Encourage them to speak truth to power, support them when they do, and then do your part, too.
Thank you for your time.
This blog is my job. If it moves you, please help me keep doing this Work by sharing some of your food, shelter, or money. Thank you!
The devaluation of male submission | Delving into Deviance
(This is gently understated, and very true. I’d be harsher. I’d also be punitively flamed for being harsher. Think about that.)
This blog is my job. If it moves you, please help me keep doing this Work by sharing some of your food, shelter, or money. Thank you!
I am surprised that no one has commented about the presence of alcohol on virtually every party-style shoot at Kink. You can count the red cups in the promotional images of Public Disgrace and they are a sure indicator that the shoot took place on a closed set inside the armory. There is also a lot of liquor on The Upper Floor and many of the websites under the larger Kink umbrella do host live party shoots there from time to time.
[…]
It cannot be ignored that the ethics of consent are murky when non-compensated and non-industry guests make up the bulk of the party and the company hosting the event stands to profit from someone doing something they might not have otherwise done sober. Your admission ticket into the party with free food and free booze are any and all of the images that are recorded during your stay and whether or not you like what you did they will run.
The Ultimate Surrender live matches used to provide free alcohol for the audience but after some problems they moved to a BYOB model that has been working out very well so far. The Upper Floor and the Speakeasy at the Armory still have free and open bars that are always kept very well stocked. At an Ultimate Surrender live match, audience participation is limited to cheering from the stands. Audience members are *not* encouraged to interact sexually with the wrestlers but at Public Disgrace or The Upper Floor guests *are* encouraged to interact sexually with models and other guests.
Mata Hari’s comment on “Consent and Public Disgrace”
I found this extremely interesting.
This blog is my job. If it moves you, please help me keep doing this Work by sharing some of your food, shelter, or money. Thank you!
He also had to hold me by the thigh to keep me from sliding off the narrow sofa, so we decided to move to the bed. When he got up he complained his center of gravity had changed.
“Having fun?” he asked me when I had straddled him again.
I smirked as I reached down to spread myself open, pressing my clit against his tummy bulge. “Can’t you feel how wet I am?”
We resumed the tummy-pressing clit grinding that was my version of sex.
This blog is my job. If it moves you, please help me keep doing this Work by sharing some of your food, shelter, or money. Thank you!
Ejaculating Stallion by Hans Baldung, 1534
This blog is my job. If it moves you, please help me keep doing this Work by sharing some of your food, shelter, or money. Thank you!
Transcript of my appearance on Sexploration with Monika this past Friday.
VOICEOVER: This is sex. Everyone gets what they want. This is Sexploration. Explore, play! This is Sexploration with Monika. Sex is proof that God loves us and wants us to have fun! Sexploration with Monika on FCCFreeRadio.com.
MONIKA: What a night tonight is going to be! We are having a “Sex Geek Potluck.” It’s basically like a conference, a very informal conference, of sex educators. We have filmmakers, we have sex workers, we have activists, we have people who are making some very sexy and interesting and strange sexual technology to do scientific experiments on orgasm. And it was the brainchild of sex educator Reid Mihalko of ReidAboutSex.com. Yay, and the crowd goes wild! Reid, Reid, Reid, Reid! Okay, so…
[FADE OUT]
…destabilizing hierarchy and creating community, which is precisely what the Sex Geek Potluck is all about!
[LAUGHTER]
REID MIHALKO: “Yes!” He said, rolling on his wheelchair, trying to catch the mic! Yeah, so, for the people tuning in right now, I’m trying to flip-camera some of this. I’ll be flip-camera-ing a lot of tonight, and I’m also your official wrangler.
MONIKA: You’re, yes.
[FADEOUT]
Well, I want to talk about maymay’s work, so maymay, if you will join the discussion. And then, we also have—okay, so who do we have after maymay? We have Priscilla of SexxBBoxx—oh, yes, Maggie, yes! Don’t forget about Maggie. Okay, so Maggie’s after maymay. So Maggie from PSIgasm.
MAYMAY: Usually she comes before me.
[LAUGHTER]
MONIKA: Oh, Maggie—Maggie Mayhem?
MAYMAY: Yeah. Usually it’s the other way around….
MONIKA: Awesome! She’s totally next door. Maggie Mayhem’s next door.
AUDIENCE: Oh, she’s next door?
MONIKA: Yeah, go get her. Go get your hummus and go get her. Okay, so she’s—Maggie Mayhem’s gonna talk about PSIgasm. So maymay is here from Kink On Tap.
MAYMAY: Hi!
MONIKA: Hi, maymay nice to see you again!
MAYMAY: So good to see you again!
MONIKA: Yeah!
MAYMAY: It’s been too long.
MONIKA: It has been too long. We talked a little bit about how you’re working with Megan Andelloux about remaking male submission.
MAYMAY: Well, I’m going to be doing a seminar there, at The Center for Sexual Pleasure and Health—I think it’s March 23rd? I hope I got that right—at The Center for Sexual Pleasure and Health, called “Remaking Male Submission” and what I’m going to be talking about is confronting sexism in the BDSM community—
MONIKA: Right!
MAYMAY: —and actually in BDSM porn and, sort of, the imagery, the iconography of BDSM, or SM imagery, where you see a dominatrix. The question really is, is that (with the leather and the whips) is that really much more or less, is that not a virgin-whore dichotomy or is that another sort of manifestation of it? Are we, sort of, infused by the mainstream culture?
MONIKA: Well, I think that we definitely have ideas about gender—
MAYMAY: Absolutely.
MONIKA: that infuse porn in kind of a—it can be really toxic.
MAYMAY: Yeah.
MONIKA: And not affirming of people’s full sexual expression.
MAYMAY: And yet we call it an “alternative” sexuality, right?
MONIKA: Right.
MAYMAY: So the question is, of course, “Alternative to what?” And then the question becomes, well we talk about an alternative to this, and then we have to gauge is it reactionary? So, when we talk about alternative sexuality, is it ‘a reaction to’? And I think that a lot of the formulations we see on SM iconography, especially when it comes to men who are submissive and women who are dominant, what we see is in fact a reification of a very misogynistic worldview. And that’s unfortunate. I, as a submissive man myself, definitely want to—
MONIKA: Okay! Back up a little bit. Okay, so how is a dominatrix and a male submissive misogynist? Or woman-hating?
MAYMAY: Right, well, it’s a good question, because, y’know, we—
MONIKA: ‘Cause ordinarily people would say, “Oh, that’s a very empowered woman!” Ba-da-da-da-da….
MAYMAY: Well they wouldn’t—well, “ordinarily” is an interesting adjective to use there. What I find so fascinating is that so much of the pornography that we look at of dominatrices, of men being submissive, sort of de-sexualizes the male persona in the imagery—
MONIKA: Oh, yeah!
MAYMAY: —and hyper-sexualizes the female persona.
MONIKA: Hmm.
MAYMAY: And what’s interesting about that is that, it’s very much like putting the woman on a pedestal. It’s just a different pedestal. It’s still a pedestal. So the question isn’t—
MONIKA: Rather than an objectified pedestal, it’s just a, sort of, like a…
MAYMAY: Well, you could argue—
MONIKA: It’s objectified in another way.
MAYMAY: Exactly. So, it’s not—
MONIKA: Like a power object.
MAYMAY: Right. So, we have this interesting notion of the “male gaze” or the “female gaze” in pornography and a lot of, sort of, counter-culture pornographers now are making “porn for women!” And the idea of porn for women is that the subject in the porn, the person holding the camera, is a woman, is a female. But in a lot of femdom porn, y’know, you don’t get that.
MONIKA: And what’s femdom porn? It’s when the—
MAYMAY: Female dominant.
MONIKA: —female dominant is….
MAYMAY: And let’s talk about just that phrasing.
MONIKA: Okay….
MAYMAY: “Femdom” porn often includes men who are being submissive and women who are being dominant, or includes women who are being submissive and women who are being dominant. The object in either of those situations is the female top. Right?
MONIKA: Right.
MAYMAY: The objectified persona there is the woman being dominant. So, as a submissive guy, I have to wonder whether or not that’s actually catering to—
MONIKA: Why don’t you get to be objectified?
MAYMAY: That’s my question! Hey! And I realize that’s a very—it’s hard be—it’s a very non-objectifying thing to say, “Please objectify me!”
[LAUGHTER]
MONIKA: You’re, like, asking for a voice.
MAYMAY: Suddenly you’ve got agency there, and it’s hard, especially for bottoms in the SM community.
MONIKA: Because you don’t really speak up as bottoms.
MAYMAY: We’re not taught agency. We’re taught how to be okay not having agency, as bottoms. That’s a really important thing. It’s really helpful and important to know that it’s also okay to not have agency in some situations.
MONIKA: Sure.
MAYMAY: Y’know, we deal with that in reality all the time. On the other hand, it’s also very, very, very empowering to be able to say as a bottom, “I’d like you to objectify me, please.”
MONIKA: Right.
MAYMAY: And you are claiming agency in that.
MONIKA: And it’s really nice to have a choice.
MAYMAY: Um, I would argue it’s a way to improve the world, to have a choice.
MONIKA: Yeah, totally.
MAYMAY: That’s a world-changing, sort of, sentiment.
MONIKA: Yeah, it’s destabilizing the hegemony and all that stuff.
MAYMAY: Precisely.
MONIKA: And the hierarchy and the dualism.
MAYMAY: Right. So that’s what the class is going to be about in March.
MONIKA: Cool.
MAYMAY: I’m looking forward to it. I’ve never taught at The CSPH before, but I’ve been there, and it’s a fantastic little spot.
MONIKA: And you are also a panelist on the Western Regional LBT—
MAYMAY: LGBTQIA, alphabet soup, conference.
MONIKA: —Conference—
MAYMAY: Yes, indeed.
MONIKA: —at UC Berkeley, with Maggie Mayhem!
MAYMAY: With Maggie, yeah! This is going to be a lot of fun. This is a BDSM 101 panel. So, Louie and William, who are a UC Berkeley alumn and a student there, they’re facilitating a panel with me, with Maggie, with a couple other people about just the beginnings of BDSM. It’s very much for newbies. We’re not gonna talk about pornography a whole bunch, we’re not gonna talk about gaze, it’s really gonna be about, y’know, how do you stay safe? What are the main theories of consent? What are the differences—
MONIKA: Oh, just the beginning.
MAYMAY: Very, very, very novice level stuff.
MONIKA: Sure, right.
MAYMAY: But we also—the hope is that we’ll also humanize a lot of what people see. Because everyone’s gonna come into that room, sort of, having an idea of what SM is.
MONIKA: Right.
MAYMAY: They’re gonna have an image in their head of a dominatrix. I just need to say “dominatrix” and you’ve instantly see, y’know—
MONIKA: Wapsshhhh! [whip noise]
MAYMAY: Exactly.
MONIKA: She’s wearing a black pencil skirt and it’s leather!
MAYMAY: And she’s got a corset on, and she’s in hells, y’know? Like, you instantly see that image. And that’s because—
MONIKA: And probably red lipstick.
MAYMAY: Probably red lipstick. Uh, interestingly enough, probably also a collar, and what does that say about our culture?
MONIKA: Right.
MAYMAY: That’s an interesting one, too. But, y’know, you instantly have this idea and that comes from, of course, mainstream culture. There’s a huge amount of fetishization in marketing, in, y’know—have you guys seen the Volkswagen commercial with the woman wielding the whip? They’re selling a car! And the way they’re doing it is she’s whipping the car!
MONIKA: Oh, interesting!
MAYMAY: I am not [kidding], like, literally whipping the car. She’s not whipping the car very well, but, she’s whipping the car.
MONIKA: Oh, really? She’s not whipping it well? That’s hilarious!
MAYMAY: No, her technique is a little bit—
MONIKA: She’s got bad technique!
MAYMAY: It’s…it can use some improvement.
MONIKA: [laughing] That’s awesome!
MAYMAY: I don’t want to speak too ill of her on the air, but, uh, it’s less than good.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
But the point is that everyone’s gonna come into that room having an idea of it. But the idea that we typically get from the marketers, who want to sell you a Volkswagen—as opposed to, y’know, wanting you to have a good time in bed because they care about you ‘cause they’re your partners—they don’t have the same…they don’t understand people who do those activities as full human beings. Like, I—I’m a programmer, y’know? I also spend my time at the park. And I like Vietnamese sandwiches. And these are things you don’t typically hear about—
MONIKA: [laughing] ‘Cause you live in the Tenderloin—
MAYMAY: ‘Cause I live in the Tenderloin, which is awesome.
MONIKA: —near the sandwich places.
MAYMAY: Oh, Saigon Sandwich?
MONIKA: I love that place.
MAYMAY: Big, big slices of carrot! Really good!
MONIKA: [laughing]
MAYMAY: So, but, we’re hoping also to humanize—
MONIKA: Right.
MAYMAY: —people who do SM—
MONIKA: Right.
MAYMAY: —in a way that we’re hoping will be a, sort of, gentle introduction for folks. And make it less scary! The subtitle of the talk—of the panel—is called “Kink Isn’t So Scary.”
MONIKA: Cool! And this is maymay from Kink On Tap. You can find him at KinkOnTap.com. We’ve been talking about his work remaking male submission and then, of course, this conference at UC Berkeley coming up.
MAYMAY: There’s also another conference, actually. If you are on the East coast, KinkForAll Providence 2 is happening on March 19th, so I’ll be there for that as well.
MONIKA: Oh, neat!
MAYMAY: Yeah. Megan might be there, too, in fact.
MONIKA: Oh, neat! Megan Andelloux, cool.
MAYMAY: And that’s at KinkForAll.org.
MONIKA: And Maggie Mayhem is also going to be on the Western Regional LGBTQIA Conference at UC Berkeley as a panelist. What are you looking forward to talking about?
MAGGIE: I am looking forward so much about this conference because I actually attended when I was an undergraduate and a freshman the LGBTQIA conference in 2004 and 2005. And I absolutely loved that experience. I had never had—I’d never seen so many queers in one place at one time.
[LAUGHTER]
MONIKA: Isn’t that nice? To be like, “Wow, I’m not even that freaky right now.”
MAGGIE: Oh my god! It was amazing! I would have the most amazing conversation of my life, followed by the most amazing conversation, of my life, followed by the most amazing conversation of my life, followed by the worst meal of my life—
[LAUGHTER]
—followed by a great conversation and then so many flirtations—
MONIKA: And then there’s that.
MAGGIE: —both physically and intellectually, and emotionally, because so many people were talking about so many things. I was flirting with ideas. And I loved that conference for that reason. It was intellectual foreplay. And then—
MONIKA: That’s what they call it. Y’know, intercourse?
MAGGIE: Yes!
MONIKA: Like, dialogue. Intercourse.
MAGGIE: Oh, yeah.
MAYMAY: There’s intercourse and discourse.
MONIKA: Right, exactly!
MAGGIE: Intercourse and discourse, yeah.
[FADEOUT]
It’s a lot of work. I hand it to the organizers.
MONIKA: But it’s really important to create—
MAGGIE: Oh, vital!
MONIKA: —queer community—
MAGGIE: Yes.
MONIKA: —and sex community, because I think so much of our stuff is in the closet and marginalized.
MAGGIE: Yes.
MONIKA: I mean, there’s so many people that are like, “Oh, no, you can’t say that on the radio. You can’t do that in Newspapers.” You know what I mean? All that stuff.
MAGGIE: “You can’t say that on television.”
MAYMAY: “You can’t print that on the Internet!”
MONIKA: Oh, the Internet, no!
MAYMAY: Absolutely, yeah! I’ve been in Providence, when I was actually visiting Megan one time previously, I went to the adult section of the Providence public library. The adult section—they had a kid’s section and an adult’s section—and I figured, y’know, I would be able to get to my blog specifically because I was going to the adult section. Turns out, nope, my blog was censored in the adult section in the public library.
MONIKA: Wow. In the adult section. That’s weird.
MAYMAY: Yeah.
MAGGIE: Censorship is really, really incredible. You start to feel important. I’m starting to notice that my website—
MAYMAY: [laughing] You start to feel important!
MAGGIE: —my website is being censored!
MONIKA: Yeah….
MAYMAY: Congratulations!
MAGGIE: Thank you!
MONIKA: You are getting a certain amount of dominant culture recognition when you’re censored.
MAGGIE: I have a dangerous ideologue.
MONIKA: That’s right.
MAGGIE: And it’s driving me crazy. I’ve never felt so powerful in my life until I was censored.
MAYMAY: That’s right.
MONIKA: It’s annoying, though, ‘cause now you’re like, “I’m reaching slightly less.”
MAGGIE: I actually got really interested in censorship on the Internet because I worked with the San Francisco homeless shelter system and I didn’t realize how severe sexual censorship was until I was doing an HIV training. And I was trying to facilitate not only HIV 101 skills but also research skills. I wanted to try to pass on information about how one evaluates a source. How do you determine how accurate it is? How inaccurate it is? Because, um, in the homeless system, you’re working with people who did not get to have a formal education in the same way. It’s always been interrupted. So, these are skills that many people take for granted. How do you evaluate a sexual source that is going to be, um, biologically, medically accurate?
Language is changing constantly. If you look at something, we’re using different terms, moving above and beyond. So I wanted to show that. And one of the questions I asked was—I did this with an Internet, um, “scavenger hunt,” I called it. I asked questions; I was trying to implant as many keywords one would search for with a question. I said, “I know you don’t have the answers to any of this. They’re very complex. I want you to go use Google, and tell me what you find.” And every single person in the shelter came back and said, “You set us up. You’re wasting our time. They’re calling me names. They’re very angry with me.”
And I’m thinking, “All right, patience. It’s a teaching moment. I’m teaching people how to use Google. It’s a harder skill to learn than you might think, especially if you’ve never had a computer.” Until I realized that the search—
MONIKA: It’s the library staff is, sort of, not letting the homeless people use the computers, or something?
MAGGIE: Well, there’s that problem. But in the shelters it’s so, so, so censored because they’re so afraid of pornography, that every sexual keyword is blocked. And the question I noticed that this was important for was—especially in an HIV regard—I asked, “What is PEP? And how do you get it in the city of San Francisco?”
MONIKA: Post-exposure…?
MAGGIE: Post-exposure prophylaxis.
[FADEOUT]
So, PEP is something I take seriously because it is preventing infections. It is making a change and people in a shelter system are in some of the highest risk demographic and they have some of the least resources.
MAYMAY: Were they able to find it? Were they able to answer the question that you asked?
MAGGIE: The entire search string was blocked.
MAYMAY: The search string?
MAGGIE: Literally, the search string—
MAYMAY: Oh my god.
MAGGIE: —came up with a window that said, “The firewall is preventing this search. It is an unacceptable adult search.” Because all of the pages about post-exposure prophylaxis included words like “anal sex.”
MONIKA: Right.
MAMYAY: God. See, but that’s what’s so interesting that I find about censorship, because it’s almost like the censorship itself will almost create new slang. Right?
MAGGIE: Correct.
MAYMAY: People who work around the censorship, socially speaking—kids do this! You know the, “Oh, is that what kids are calling it these days?” What that means—
MAGGIE: Yes!
MAYMAY: —that is a new—that is an evolution of language to avoid whether it be technical censorship on Google or whether it be, “Oh, I don’t want my parents to know that I’m talking about this.”
MAGGIE: “I don’t want my parents to know that I’m talking about this,” but also when you’re talking about health resources, we’ve banned the language that literally on Google will find the resources to prevent getting infection. But the porn—
MONIKA: Right, yeah.
MAGGIE: —that they’re so worried about, you can find it a million different ways.
MAYMAY: Yeah.
MAGGIE: So we’re not keeping the porn out, we’re keeping the good information out.
MONIKA: Not that there’s anything wrong with porn.
MAGGIE: No! There is nothing wrong with porn. I do porn!
MONIKA: There is nothing wrong with porn.
MAYMAY: So, that’s the thing. I think the moral of the story is, “Just say no to censorship, kids.”
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
MAGGIE: Say no to censorship!
MAYMAY: No to censorship. Just say no.
[LAUGHTER]
MONIKA: Okay, so I’d like to thank maymay from Kink On Tap, KinkOnTap.com.
MAYMAY: Thank you, Monika, this was awesome.
MONIKA: Yeah, thank you!